"If I Told You I Was Crazy, Would You Believe Me? If I Told You I Loved You, Would You Think Me Insane?"
Site: I want to whisper in your ear
Setting: High school stage, afternoon, Early spring
during a thunderstorm, everyone is there. It's just before
a rehearsal and most everyone is milling around on the
stage, the rest are in the pit.
Aaron: (puts arm around Chole's waist) What's wrong with
you? (pokes her in the stomach and she jumps and smiles
Chole: Nothing. (she lays her head on his shoulder and
Aaron: Liar. (pokes her again) Tell me.
Chole: Don't poke me.
Aaron: Tell me.
Chole: (grins slyly) What'll you give me?
Aaron: I'll poke you again if you don't. Tell me.
Chole: (looks at him for a moment) Nothing.
Aaron: (looks at her intensely) Tell me.
Chole: Nothing! (shrugs him off)
Chole: (walks off a few steps) What do you see when you
look at me?
Aaron: (looks her up and down with a leer)
Chole: (smiles) Cut it out, Aaron, you're dating someone.
(now serious) Honestly, what do you see when you look at me?
Aaron: (serious too) I see a beautiful young woman. Very
Chole: Then if I'm so beautiful, why am I alone?
Aaron: (steps to her and hugs her then holds her at arms
length) I don't know. I guess no one is intelligent enough
to realize how wonderful you are.
Chole: How long have we known each other?
Aaron: (runs a hand through his messy hair) Since
Chole: (smiles ironically) Then how come you haven't
realized how wonderful I am?
Aaron: (all seriousness gone) I have, babah.
(melodramatic) Lets run away together! I love you, baby!
Chole: Shut up. (she sniffs and wraps her arms around her
shoulders and begins to cry very quietly) Damn.
Aaron: I'm sorry. You know I love ya. (gives her a
quick squeeze and dashes off to the pit and is intercepted
by his girlfriend, Leigh. Chole watches then embracing for
a moment then turns out to the audience)
Chole: (whispers) Yeah. (She sniffs again and wipes her
eyes. She stands up straight and turns around to face the
group. Smiles sassily and yells.) Which one of you would
date me? (no one looks her way) Hello! I said, which one
of you would date me? (still no one looks. She is
desperate for a response of any kind.) Who wants to fuck
me?! (incredibly enough, no one responds. In fact, the
people closest to her have become statues, frozen exactly
in the middle of what they were doing. As she watches
openmouthed, the freezing spreads like spilled water,
catching people and turning them to statues. There are a
large number of couples present, caught in poses of
closeness and intimacy. Everyone else is arranged in
groups, caught in poses of excited conversation.)
Chole: (screams) What's wrong with you people?! (She
looks into Michael's face. He is sitting on the floor
nearby holding Megan on his lap and frozen laughing.)
Michael? (She stands up straight and begins babbling)
This is it. I've gone crazy. I always knew it would come.
(sobbing) I'm so lonely, and I know that sounds stupid,
but it is the worst pain there is. (She is talking to the
audience, sometimes imploringly, sometimes furiously) I'm a
nice person. Truly. And all these people are good
friends, but I'm so damn lonely. I'm good enough for a
drunken screw and confessions, but not for love. How long
has it been since someone held me? I'm not talking about a
companionable hug; I'm talking about caring and tenderness
and love. Not lust either. I'll tell you when. Not since
Brian. (The lights darken on the statues behind her, and a
tall young man with dark hair walks to her from off stage.)
Brian: I missed you so much. (gives her a hug) I'm on
leave for a week, and I thought I'd drop by.
Chole: (cold) You lied to me.
Brian: (hurt) I'm so sorry. I thought you forgave me. I
never meant to hurt you. I love you.
Chole: (furious) You LIED to me, you bastard! I trusted
every word you said. I BELIEVED in you! And you Lied to
me! You got down on one knee and asked me to marry you,
and all the time you were lying to me! Every word was a
Brian: (kisses her passionately.) Forgive me. I grew up
trying to survive, you know what my parents did to me. I
learned to lie to get attention. And when you said you
would marry me, I tried to stop, but I just couldn't.
Please, Chole, please forgive me. Don't leave me. It
would kill me. I love you. (whispers) I love you.
Chole: (in extreme pain) I love you, but I don't know
you. You are my husband, but I don't know you. I married
someone who doesn't exist. Good bye, Brian honey.
Brian: But ma cherie, I love you!
Chole: (furious) Just leave. (Brian freezes in a pose of
sheer anguish and shame, head hanging, shoulders slumped.
The lights come back up) (to the audience) I don't think
he loved me. Oh, I'm sure he thought he loved me, but ...
And we never did get married, not legally. We had a pagan
ceremony in Montgomery, Alabama. It was beautiful. But it
was on an Air Force base, and I don't think my Goddess
appreciated that. (She sits on a table, moving a person
out of her way who walks on his own as long as she touches
him. She sighs and notices Ian staring at her. She gets up
and walks perpindicular to him and his head follows her
movements. She walks to him.) Y'know, I really like you.
You're tall and good natured and good looking. We share a
similar loneliness, and I seem to catch you staring at me
quite often. I don't know what it is about you, but I have
this frequent dream that we're married. I'm fairly certain
you like me. All I want is a bit of tenderness. We don't
have to love each other, just be very close and caring. It
would be so simple, so nice. Why did you never talk to me?
(screams) Why?! Am I unapproachable? Am I a brick wall?
Do we speak different languages? Why?! (she falls against
him, weeping, and he slowly moves his arms. He holds her
and she stops crying.)
Ian: I was afraid. (Curtain closes.)
(c)opyright 1998 by SarahLeeAnn